New Years Theme

I sense a theme here, every new year I get inspired to write...Then life happens and I don't keep up with the blog. What's really going on? Well, for one, I've always done better at writing when I'm miserable and going through, however, lately, I've not wanted to be transparent because I know the power of words. After I read the Secret, I wondered what I was putting out in the universe and how it was coming back to me. I went through times of feeling like I was jinxing myself by discussing certain things. So many things last year were still up in the air, in my life, in my head, in my heart. But now I feel a bit more settled and a bit more sure of myself. I know that writing is one of my dreams, and I'm committed to seeing it through no matter how painful or difficult it may be to see myself reflected in my writings. I love my last blog from January 2012- I know that I am going somewhere, that there will be ups and downs but I'm confident in the person that I am and the life that I'm choosing to live. I am married and committed to my marriage. I am still a mother and love my children with all my heart. My husband and I have had our own baby which has colored our relationship and deepened our dedication to each other. His name is Benji and he is a one-of-a-kind. My job is wonderful. The organization I work for: Moms2B ( is one of those rare gems that is working to transform people's lives. They are able to use my skill set while being open and developing and it's a great place for me to grow professionally as well as personally. I love my friends so much. I have ride or die friends that are there for everything. I've also lost some friends very close to me because of their opinion about how I handle certain things in my life. I've visited Israel twice and love it! I can definitely see myself living there one day. I love my in-laws- they are so special. I am truly blessed to live this unorthodox life that keeps me close to God's love and mercy every day.

Blogging is therapeutic but also scary, because I can go back and read my entries and remember exactly how I was feeling, what I was thinking and something it's different than the stories I've had to create to move on, or to be strong. But that's okay. All of these things written here are here for a reason. And to go back and read and recognize my strengths as well as my weaknesses can only make me a better writer and a better person in the long run. I invite people to look into my life, not as spectators, but as concerned observers, who may learn something about themselves by looking into my life. My fears are your fears and my triumphs are your triumphs and my unanswered questions are there for us both to analyze and look for answers. I am very comfortable in my skin, and invite you to take off your masks, take off your roles and evaluate who you are underneath all of that. And when you find that person, love (him) her fiercely (in the words of Ntozake Shange).

I am still soaring through the storm, enjoying the rain as well as the sunlight when it appears. The joy is that I am soaring, that it ain't hard being me. My smiles come easily as do my hugs. I am working on my anger and my weight and my impulsiveness. But I love all of me and I invite those close to me to love me too! But more importantly, I invite you to love yourselves unapologetically!